I have realized, as of late, that I have been measuring my self-worth by a precarious standard of success. This measuring rod I have been observing is on my sales page on Amazon. I have recently released the second version of my novel, The Shattered Vase. https://www.amazon.com/Shattered-Vase-Book-Life/dp/B0BLK6ZXLP
As a Christian author, I find it imperative that I constantly examine my desires and motivations to make sure they align with my faith. If reaching lost souls for Christ is the aim of my writing, then wouldn’t fabulous success be in line with my faith? Yes, it would be…but not if success becomes my idol.
As I continue on my journey up this elusive mountain called fame, I must be conscious of my motivation.
Is my motivation to gain followers, influence, and money? Or is it to glorify God, even if I do not gain followers, influence, or money? I have said in my author bio that the book I released could not have been written without God in my life. Is this God who I worship and adore impressed by followers, influence, or money? Or is He impressed by a gentle and humble spirit?
I am grateful for the humble beginning of my journey.
When you are an unknown author, every person who reaches out to give encouragement and praise is highly valued. I have learned to appreciate my friends and family for the support they have given me. I feel as if I value them more because my struggle has been challenging. If I had gained fame immediately, I may have become proud and elusive, shielding myself from those I love.
Last week at a birthday party for one of my friends, the birthday girl introduced me as an author and stated that she had bought my book and was looking forward to reading it. She so sweetly gave me center stage for a moment, when really the stage should have been all about her because it was her birthday party, not mine.
Just yesterday one of my sons spent two hours working on my website fine-tuning it. I am sure he had plenty of other things he could have done with his time, but he made my website a priority in his busy day.
These are the memories I cherish and hold dear to my heart.
Success may be a treacherous platform to stand on, but with my eyes set on Jesus, it needn’t consume me.
The greatest gift I have received in this life is not being on the bestseller list but having an intimate relationship with God. The sacrifice of Jesus made this possible. If I gain success and lose that, I have lost much more than I have gained.